This is a topic i've tried to tackle on many occasions. But every time i try to start to write about it i get so pissed off and sidetracked with nine thousand other tyrannical rants of mine that can't finish. But since the Bible says we're all going to die tomorrow I figured i'd try.
Hahahahahaha.
We all i know believe the bible about as much as i believe lance armstrong has two testicles. But for every anti-religion bone in my body there is an equal and opposite bone of "you never know for sure about anything". So, i decided to finally tackle this just on the off-chance we do all die tomorrow...because i would be sooo pissed off that those weirdos were right i'd probably get sent to heaven as punishment and never get to tell my friends how i really feel.
"Rapture" will not end the world. The qualities of humans will end the world. Qualities displayed everyday on Facebook.
Facebook embodies all that is wrong with American society. And i'm not talking about the unsophisticated, materialistic, superficial statuses about why your life sucks people. I'm not talking about the annoying "every 45 second update of what your pride and joy shit machine did today" parents. I'm not talking about the painful to endure "spelling mistakes or stupid abbreviations" asshole. Or even the pathetic attempt for attention by stating that you are "deactivating your account later that night" person. I'm not even talking about the most faithful of Farmville users.
Don't get me wrong. Those people suck. But there lives an even lower breed.
Who must he be talking about? It must be the conceited girl that untags all but only the perfectly photoshopped pictures of herself. Or the re-post this status because *un-friend* person. Maybe it's the annoying poster/messager that can't take a hint that you don't give a shit about them. Or the "just answered a question about you that you can't see unless you add this app" person? Or maybe the person with a dragon as a profile picture..and a race-car as their only other profile picture? Or the "righteous, arrogant, chauvinistic asshole that posts his blogs as updates" guy?
Contrary to popular belief, these are the people that make Facebook good. Facebook is an extremely unique social networking idea that allows everyone the chance to express themselves to a willing audience. Facebook is fucking incredible. It blows my mind (no sarcasm). The fact that you can keep tabs on literally everyone you've ever really met (or partially met, or were at the same party with, or stalked through a friend of a friend) is incredible.
See Mark Zuckerberg was a fucking genius. He manipulated the fact that all any person ever really wants is to be heard. Plain and simple. He combined the human necessity of needing to be important with technological advances and created something bigger than anyone could ever imagine. Golf clap.
People can bitch and moan about life all year long. They can say happy birthday to old and new friends alike. You can create an idealistic profile of yourself for all the world to see. Facebook is connecting people in a way never before fathomed on this planet. We are literally taking part in one of the most historical events of all time.
But just like everything in life, people ruin it. Side rant...fuck i tried to avoid this but it is necessary....people are the root of all evil. Not money (we created money), not religion (we created religion), not Oprah. Well, she plays a huge role but i digress...
The people that ruin Facebook are the same people that will REALLY bring this world to an end (not Christians). The most low-life, undeserving, unproductive, delusional, pointless, idle, futile, immoral, demonic, sinister, heinous, wicked, unethical, immoral son of a fucking bitches are the people that go on Facebook with the sole purpose to incriminate another individual.
What makes America so great is fucking FREEDOM. Freedom of speech, freedom of press, freedom of religion. So what the FUCK do you care if little johnny is drinking with his parents? Why the FUCK do you care if underaged athletes party with one another in the spirit of building camaraderie? Why the FUCK do you care that your potential employer has pictures of her tits hanging out?
This really, really, realllly fucking pisses me off. I understand that there are college athletes that happen to be underaged that are getting suspended from games because they post photos of themselves drinking. That is stupid. And I understand people lose their jobs over stupid shit they have on Facebook. That is stupid too. But listen fucker, if you won't hire me because of something on my Facebook then not only do i never want to work for you in the first place but i hope you die an excruciating death. Fucking relax. It's a fake profile where people are way cooler and more important than they ever will be in real life. Why don't you just understand that you stupid fucking dumbass.
My parents are always like, "be careful what you post online". And I understand that is what they are supposed to tell me. And i understand that they are just looking out for me.
I UNDERSTAND BUT ITS FUCKING STUPID.
THESE DOUCHEBAGS ARE RUINING FACEBOOK.
FACEBOOK IS ABOUT FREEDOM.
INCRIMINATING OTHERS FOR THINGS ON THEIR FACEBOOK PROFILE IS UN-AMERICAN, COWARDLY, AND AN EMBARRASSING ATTEMPT TO COMFORT YOUR LOUSY, PATHETIC EXISTENCE.
I HATE YOU.
EVERYONE HATES YOU.
YOU ARE THE REASON THE WORLD IS DOOMED, NOT SOME FABRICATED RELIGIOUS NOVEL.
Repeat Offender: Allison Road (21), Found Out About You (18)
BRYtunes Genius Recommendation: I Will Follow You Into The Dark - Death Cab (88)
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