Enough with the deep meaningful tomfoolery.
Last night I went to a Carrie Underwood concert with my girlfriend, her mother, and her sister. No homo.
First and foremost, live music is a double edged sword. I enjoy bands at bars for the most part. They liven the atmosphere, drone out superficial four letter females (two words work here), and usually are significantly better than atrocious. Most importantly, however, they are on stage because they love what they do. This isn't their bread-making career per se but a passion of theirs and I respect that.
Seeing as I have a blog dedicated to music, you may jump to the conclusion that I have been to a million and a half (sidenote: would this constitute 1,500,000 or 1,000,000.5?) concerts. The fact of the matter is, however, I don't normally go hunting for concerts to attend.
A short list of reasons why: 1) laziness- travel, parking, hotel, no thank you. 2) money- i have your all of your songs conveniently located on my laptop, why would i pay ridiculous prices for a ticket to watch you play a set that more than likely won't consist of the songs i want to hear. and most importantly, 3) if i watch you live and you suck, you immediately lose all credibility in my book.
Since puberty, i have had this uncanny ability to gauge the sincerity of a person after being around them for a short period of time (some may call this being judgemental but i prefer the term really really fast character analysis). My point is that if you (directed to the performer) drag your ass on stage because it pays the bills, because it gets you laid, or any other vacuous reason, i disdain your guts.
On to the concerts I have attended for one reason or another...
Tim Mcgraw is a dick wad. He was lousy. This was just a case of talentlessness. Its like dude, how again did you make it in this business? You know you have to sing live right?
Lead members of dashboard confessional, O.A.R., and Sons of Silvia are total douche bags. The second you point your instrument or microphone at one of the numerous five letter females (one word beginning with "w" works here) in the crowd with the sole intent to bang her later that night (more likely than not, successfully) i suddenly hope you choke and die. I know what you are thinking...oh you're just jealous, you'd do the same thing. Au contraire. One, i don't need to be a talented musician to get laid. Two, this isn't the right venue...i mean thats why facebook was invented. Three, despite what you may think i do hold some moral values (my weakest case).
On the other hand, there have been some pleasant surprises. Faith Hill was fucking unbelievable. Remarkable. Craig Morgan was so authentically genuine (albeit not as talented as some of the aforementioned artists- sons of silvia have musical talent that would equate to mark prior's pitching potential) that i wanted to jump up and say "I like you craig! You're kinda cool! Don't let my friends know I told you!" Glassjaw was amazing as well. Now, faith hill, craig morgan, and glassjaw aren't even in my top 100 artists. Country isn't really my cup of tea and hardcore insanity isn't either. But respect was most certainly in order. Props to you for being yourself.
The only concert I have really gone out of my way to see was Brand New (well taking back sunday too but my recollection of that evening is skewed due to intoxication and a moot point in this argument). They are my favorite band. Needless to say I was extremely nervous/anxious. What if they were scum bags too? Would it ruin them? Luckily I'll never know. They killed it. Brand New is talented and most importantly true to themselves. The lead singer writes all of his songs and they wreak of unadulterated emotion. Short background-- a majority of his songs are about his back stabbing girl friend that slept with his best friend (and former band-mate who just so happens to be from taking back sunday). Those lyrics are real, guided, and you can feel it when he performs. As the band matured he began to question more meaningful topics such as religion with paralleled insight. You don't have to like brand new (you probably don't), but if you saw them live i think you would respect them.
Which brings me to the hot topic everyone has been dying to hear about...Carrie Underwood. Something just rubbed me the wrong way.
This girl may be the best looking person i have ever seen (slightly trumping david hasselhoff). No but seriously, 10 out of 10, smokeshow, goddess, whatever cool new words kids use to describe beauty. She also has a ridiculous set of vocals. Undeniable talent. At times she is perfection.
I don't know if it was the multiple wardrobe changes, rising stages, performing on top of a truck suspended from the ceiling, the cinematic adventure-filled dress, the glittering piano, the confetti explosion, or the dramatic "you can achieve anything you put your mind to" monologue that lost me but somewhere along the way i felt a lack of sincerity. there were so many stunts and charades i half expected vince mcmahon to make an appearance. now i understand the fact that this may be considered entertainment to some...but you can't deny that all of these shenanigans damn well shifts the emphasis away from her talent. it wasn't real to me. not sincere. i mean, i'm pretty sure that on a random tuesday in december you're not floating from your ceiling suspended by a truck and giving "be all you can be" speeches. I'm just not buying it.
After heated debate with the lady friend i did some research and sure enough...carrie underwood doesn't write her own music, was in beauty pageants, graduated (suma cum laude-apparently a very smart girl) with a degree in mass communication. Look, she is amazingly talented and very good looking but she doesn't LIVE (the "iv" not "ive" pronunciation) her music. I compare her case to that of michael vick. Dude is grossly talented but his heart was never in it. He had unheard of speed and a rocket arm (carrie's looks and voice) but he never put his time in the film room and called his own plays like peyton did--that was the coaches' job (she doesn't experience her music, she performs other writer's songs).
Repeat Offender: Before He Cheats (27)
BRYtunes Genius Recommendation: Stay Beautiful- Taylor Swift
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